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Male Contraceptives Offer Exciting Alternatives
July 31, 2011
Condoms will never go out of style, thanks to their ability to prevent the spread of most sexually transmitted infections. However, it’s always wise to use a second method to prevent pregnancy. A backup for some couples or, for those who are monogamous and STI negative, a primary means of preventing pregnancy when condoms are no longer needed.
A New York Times article discusses research being done on intriguing methods ranging from hormones to testicular ultrasounds. You can read it here. More information is also available from the Male Contraceptive Project, which lists its ”top picks” as
- RISUG/Vasalgel — A polymer gel that goes in the vas deferens and kills sperm for more than 10 years.
- Ultrasound — 1r to 30 minutes of painless treatment to the testes provides six months of contraception.
- Nonhormonal, plant-based pills — Tripterygium wilfordii — Extracts from plants traditionally known to have contraceptive effect.
- Heat methods — Keeping the testes at body temperature or hotter by tucking them into the body or doing hot water dips.
You can read more about these methods here.
The argument has long been made that contraceptive research has focused on females because they have more at stake if an unplanned pregnancy occurs. I take issue with that argument because it implies that men care less about whether they co-create a pregnancy. Sure, some men are cavalier, but recent surveys have shown that increasing numbers of men are willing to share the contraceptive burden by doing more than slipping on a condom.
It’ll be a great day when straight couples have more contraceptive options. Until then, here are a few ways male partners can share responsibility for contraception:
- Help pay for your female partner’s pills, diaphram, IUD, film, foam, etc.
- Remind your partner to use contraceptives as instructed.
- If she uses an internal method, such as a ring, a diaphragm, contraceptive film, foam, sponge, etc., offer to insert it as part of sex play.
- Accompany your partner to healthcare visits when decisions are being made.
- Wear a condom to protect you and your partner from STIs. If your partner uses an internal condom (aka “female condom”), do NOT use a condom on your penis. Never use two condoms simultaneously.
What Makes After-Exercise Sex so Hot?
July 31, 2011
Let’s say you’ve just completed a challenging run, bike ride, PX 90 or other serious workout. You’re exhausted, sweaty, smelly, and possibly horny. In fact, if you have sex, by yourself or with a partner, you may experience a super intense orgasm. Why?
During and after physical activity, the human body has elevated levels of testosterone. That jolt of hormone can give you a boost of strength and self confidence. Meanwhile, an exercise-induced increase in thyroxine boosts your energy, and epiniphrine increases the amount of blood flowing to your heart and elsewhere in the body, i.e., your genitals, if you’re aroused.
Best orgasms of your life, just by upping your exercise? Sounds like a great incentive to get fit!
Not She/He: How to Speak to a Transgender Person with Respect
July 18, 2011
Last week, my heart lurched when I read something written by a sexuality educator who referred to a transgender student as “she/he.” How can we expect the public to use respectful language if we sexuality educators aren’t getting it right?
The educator knew that the person in question was assigned the female sex at birth due to having a female body. However, the educator also knew that the student is now living as a male, concurrent with his gender identity. Unless told otherwise by the student, the educator should have used masculine pronouns out of respect for the student’s stated gender.
Using “she/he” or “he/she” is offensive to the student because it ignores his right to identify himself as he sees fit. It also dehumanizes a person, since the terms are often used like this: “He/she/it…whatever…” The educator’s offensive language indicates either her own confusion or her desire to imply that the student was confused about his gender identity. The former is far more likely than the latter. A transgender person owes no one an explanation of a very personal experience of gender; however, the fact that this student disclosed his gender identity illustrates how firm he is in his understanding of himself. It takes bravery to challenge other people’s assumptions — especially without knowing how they will respond. A sudden awareness of another person’s incongruent gender expression and identity cause some people such confusion that they become angry or violent.
Yesterday, I delivered a presentation on life changes in adulthood. Afterwards, a woman asked me whether I would share resources with her “friend’s son, who is going through the transition from man to woman.” She offered a few details and admitted that she didn’t know which nouns and pronouns to use. I respect that fact that she wanted to learn more in order to support her friend and her friend’s daughter. I used the term “daughter” to illustrate to her that it’s not just pronouns that make a difference — we need to be mindful of all of the gendered language that we use.
For a few more tips about how to speak respectfully to and with a transgender person, please read this webpage I learned about this morning. I wouldn’t normally link to a wiki page, but this information is short and practical. Here’s the link.